Wednesday, June 03, 2009

Pain in the Ass!

Am annoyed. Am madder than a hatter. Just gave mum a call to chat, ended up being irritated.

Her: Ohhh didn't know you would call. thought u have flown.
Me: of coz I'd call...else u'd scold.
Her: I don't know when u are flying...
Me: I told u it's Thurs
Her: ohh Thurs, then why did u call today?
Me: isn't it better that I call earlier? my flight is super early tmw.
Her: ya...sure.....going to enjoy life rich hor? since your flight is tmw, then u shld call tmw...
Me: ok, i'll call at 5am then.
Her: Suree.....u are welcomed to call anytime. Didn't expect u to call.

For those of u who are wondering why I'm so annoyed, well, let me tell u, the tone of the entire conversation was sarcastic. It may not seem so in writing, but trust me, she's one irritating sicko who can't stand the fact that her daughter is having a good time/ better time than her. As far back as I remember, she has always been comparing. When I tell her I can't sleep till 3am, she'll tell mi she can't sleep the whole night. When I tell her that I work till 10pm, she tells me she works till 11pm and has to do chores when she gets back. Just so you know, she has a choice. She can go home early, but does she? Noooooo..she enjoys wallowing in self pity and being in the limelight of a stage called sympathy. I think it's pathetic. I'm currently engulfed by an overwhelmingly sense of frustration and annoyance. My quest for peace in the family is often defeated by her. She's the catalyst of many quarrels. i try to be more patient as she had a bad past, but why put it upon me? It wasn't me who caused her unhappiness! She's often basking in her own self-pity and honestly I'm sick of it. THis constant pathological struggle between loving and not loving, caring and not caring, has been a tiring feat. Love transcends everything, but in our case, it has failed miserably. I've fulfilled my daughterly-duties, but yet, it's never enough for her. I'm suffocated!

Perhaps if I wasn't having a migraine and very bad backache, this episode would not have been magnified. I'm oddly uptight when it comes to such things, despite my display of bravado.

PS: Did I mention, I had a pain in the butt recently. Literally! Yes, the pain persisted for almost 15-20mins. I could not stand up! Had pins in needles in my left butt cheek! Not sure what's the trigger but I'm quite sure it's not due to the fact that I have fat ass! I quaked in fear as the pain became intolerable. Felt vulnerable and helpless as sweetie was out golfing. There was absolutely no help within an arm's length! Scary episode.


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